·1．Youve LostOn her return from school，little Dolly，aged ten，was pulled on to her Daddys knee，and informed that the fairies had that day brought a big surprise a little baby brother．She see med glad，and presently said：“Will you give me a stamp，daddy？I want to write and tell brother Tom．”The father was touched by this，and provided the little lass with the materials to write a letter to her brother，who was away at school．Later，curious to know how she would tell the news，he took an opportunity to re……
·2．PubertyOne evening，in the midst of dinner preparation，our 10 yearold daughter asked，“Mom my， whats puberty？”My wife was rushed at the moment，so she suggested that Peggy look up the word in the dictionary，after which they could talk about it．A few minutes later，Peggy returned．Her mother asked what the dictionary had said．“Puberty means，”announced Peggy，“the earliest age at which a girl is able to bear children．”“What do you think of that？” my wife asked．“Im not sure，” Peggy replied．“Ive always ……
·3．A GentlemanDick was seven years old，and his sister，Catherine．was five．One day their mother took them to their aunts house to play while she went to the big city to buy some new clothes．The children played for an hour，and then at half past four their aunt took Dick into the kitchen．She gave him a nice cake and a knife and said to him，“Now heres a knife，Dick．Cut this cake in half and give one of the pieces to your sister，but remember to do it like a gentleman．”“Like a gentleman？” Dick asked．“How……
·4．PaddyThere was a small boy who had been given a little terrier for his very own，on which he bestowed the name of Paddy，and loved mightily．He was very saddened by the fact that he could not take his pet away with him on his holidays，which he was spending with some relatives in the country．Whilst he was away Paddys young life was cut short by an unfortunate adventure with a motor．The boys mother feared he would take the news very hardly on his return；she broke it very gently，therefore，and was ra……
·5．What Are The Two Words？A very nice old lady had a few words to say to her granddaughter．“My dear，” said the old lady，“I wish you would do something for me．I wish you would promise me never to use two words．One is‘lousy’and the other is‘swell’．Would you promise me that？“Why，sure，Granny，”said the girl．“What are the two words？”5．是哪两个词？一个非常高贵的老夫人有几句话要对她的孙女说。“我亲爱的，”老夫人说：“我希望你能帮我一个忙。我要你答应永远不要用两个词。一个是‘讨厌的’，另一个是‘极好的’。你能答应我吗？”“噢，当然，奶奶。”女孩说：“是哪两个词？”……
·6．Ask Your OwnIt was a cold，raw day at Washington．Champ Clark was discussing the gamins of the cities with an English visitor．The latter expatiated on the wit of the London type of the genius．Clark declared that if the Englishman were to ask any Washington street urchin any question，the urchin would make anaptreply．They sallied forth．“What time is it，Bub？They tell me you can tell time by your nose，”said the visitor to the first newsboy they met．“Ask your own，mister，mine aint run nin’，”was the re……
·7．LimerickThere was a young lady of Niger，Who smiled as she rode on a tiger．They returned from the rideWith the lady insideAnd the smile on the face of the tiger7．打油诗有个尼日尔小姑娘，笑咪咪骑在虎背上。他们兜风回返，姑娘到了里边，笑容挂在了虎脸上。……
·8．Im GladA Sunday school teacher was telling her pupils the importance of making others glad．“Now，children，” said she，“has anyone of you ever made someone else glad？”“Please，teacher，”said a small boy，“Ive made someone glad yesterday．”“Well done．Who was that？”“My granny．”“Good boy．Now tell us how you made your grand mother glad．”“Please，teacher，I went to see her yesterday，and stayed with her three hours．Then I said to her，‘Granny，Im going home，’and she said，‘Well，Im glad’！”8．我很高兴一个主日学校的老师正在对学生讲使别……
·9．The New BabyMr．and Mrs．Taylor had a seven year old boy named Pat．Now Mrs．Taylor was expecting another child．Pat had seen babies in other peoples houses and had not liked them very much，so he was not delighted about the news that there was soon going to be one in his house too．One evening Mr．and Mrs．Taylor were making plans for the babys arrival．“This house wont be big enough for us all when the baby comes，”said Mr．Taylor．Pat came into the room just then and said，“What are you talking about？”“W……
·10．Its His FaultBilly and Bobby were small boys．They were brothers，and they often had fights with each other．Last Saturday their mother said to them，“Im going to cook our lunch now．Go out and play in the garden—and be good．”“Yes，Mummy，” the two boys answered，and they went out．They played in the garden for half an hour，and then Billy ran into the kitchen．“Mummy，” he said，“Bobbys broken a window in Mrs．Allens house．” Mrs．Allen was one of their neighbors．“Hes a bad boy，”his mother said．“How did he ……
·11．Class and AssProfessor Laurie of Glasgow put this notice on his door：“Professor Laurie will not meet his classes today．”A student，after reading the notice，rubbed out the“c”．Later Professor Laurie came along，and entering into the spirit of the joke，rubbed out the“l”．11．“班”和“笨驴”格拉斯哥的劳里教授在门上贴了这样一个通知：“劳里教授今天不会他的班。”一个学生读了通知后，擦掉了字母“c”。后来劳里教授来了，也想开开玩笑，他擦掉了字母“l”。……
·12．Alexander the GreatLandon had made an unsuccessful attempt at the recitation，and the doctor，somewhat nettled，said：“Landon，you dont seem to be getting on very fast in this subject．You seem to lack ambition．Why，at your age Alexander the Great had conquered half the world．”“Yes，” said Landon，“he couldnt help it，for you will recall the fact，doctor，that Alexander the Great had Aristotle for a teacher．”12．亚历山大大帝兰登作了一次不成功的朗诵。老师有点不悦，对他说道：“兰登，你在这门课上好像进步不大，你好像缺乏志向。亚历山大大帝在你这个年龄可已经征服了半个世界。”“是啊，”兰登说，“他没法不……
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